100 Ways to Change Your Life

General

Wellness should make you feel better (if you're anxious about your morning routine, it's not good for you)

• habits you dread is not a good thing
• best exercise is the one you like enough to stick too
• think of it's benefits
• try to find a way to make it fun

Do N of 1 experiments

• single individual experiment for yourself
• try things
• (be willing to throw things out that are popular and take things that are unpopular)
• know your goals and keep track of impacts Think about your death
• good to think about what brings you meaning in life and thus can guide you into things that are more meaningful
• enjoy the little thing
• cherish life
• gives perspective

How to stick to habits and achieve your goals

Figure out your why

• figure out how your activity is aligned with your goals
• negative avoidance is bad motivation

Utilize the fresh start effect

• new book of yourself chapter, Monday, New Month, Move, Job hop, New years etc.

Bite sized milestones

• long terms and bite sized goals
• an each day achievement (harder to procrastinate)

Use a success framework

• what's your wish?
• what would be the outcome? (How would your life be different?)
• obstacles
• workaround for obstacles

Try temptation bundling

• only indulge in chore with source or pleasure.

  • only get TV when at gym

How to wake up better

• circadian rhythm walk

Establish a morning ritual

• minor incentive to get out of bed
• a little treat (nice breakfast food)

Chrono type

• what time are you most productive Get your phone out of the bedroom

How to have more energy

Metabolically optimized meals

• maximize, fiber, antioxidants and micronutrients, omega 3's, probiotics
• minimize, refined sugar
• add seeds or herbs,
• can you add fermented foods

Micro workouts

• 5 minute morning workout routine (make it easy)
• pull ups while making dinner or pushups while coffee
• better to move more often than, all at once (for blood sugar and insulin)
• minor activities, stairs instead of elevators
• is an energy giver not hurter

Establish and stick to better boundary's

• Must express boundaries to have them be respected

• momentary discomfort

• signs you need

  • dread or anxiety
  • not full self
  • leave interaction and don't know where you stand
  • leave interaction and rethink everything

• take a pause to think about how your bandwidth factors into their requests

Active muscles to sponge glucose

Avoid decision fatigue

• create defaults and automated systems

Cold shower

• 1 minute minimum for benefits
• breathing practice to make easier
• good practice for dealing with discomfort

How to be more productive

Create a Rule of 3

• busy is not the same as productive
• (clean the house but don't revise the locations to make cleaning systemically better)
• top 3 things you want to accomplish today. Make sure they get done and actions push into them

Recognize the value of your time

• out source work

  • cooking healthy meals
  • once a month home cleaning

• consider cutting out other things in life and outsourcing to get to time back better

• compare joy of physically purchased objects (clothing toys) to outsourcing and what would make you happier

Design work based on your energy

• when do you do best, group, thinking, administrative work... Day of week? Hour of day?
• map to that
• environment (go where you have energy)

Overcome procrastination

• commitment devices, self imposed penalties
• non refundable class, item, hotel,
• social obligations / penalty

Artificially limit your time

• Parkinson's law, work expands to meet the amount of time in general
• fill perceived extra time
• self fulfilling prophecy

Direct your focus the way you want to

• flash light - focused on some info over others, one voice in convo
• flood light - general awareness
• executive control - prioritize some info over others based on goals. Makes sure action and goals are aligned
• flash light and flood light fight each other (don't work together at once)
• bad thoughts? Zoom in or zoom out. (Override with other system) Describe objectively the situation with a zoom out (envision yourself). Or zoom in and feel your physical sensations.

How to increase creativity

Just start

Gesture and fidget more

• gesturing while learning helps memory and recall

Do nothing with intention

Run into an Ah Ha moment

• physically exhaust your body to inhibit judging parts of brain
• high intensity exercise

Get in motion

• inertia is bad
• do the smallest thing to start being in motion (or getting something done )

Identify your financial dreams

• know what you want to do with your money

• what kinds of things do you love to spend money on

  • eating out, travel, wellness (common ones)
  • convenience is good

• what would it look like if you could quadruple your spending on this thing, how would it feel?

Amp up your charisma

• signal,

  • warms and competence
  • need to balance both

• ways to amp us ques

  • warms additions

    • head tilt, smile, head nod, wave with a visible palm

    • hmm and oh, vocalization

    • competence ques

      • maximizing space between ears and shoulder
      • shoulders down
      • head up
      • body relaxed and open wide
      • confident relaxed
      • add more of what you have less of

Start an advice club

• teaching is a great way to learn

Identify your unique gifts

• when do you get into flow?
• unique contributions to projects?
• anyone(s) you really trust who's opinions you can ask about your best skills?
• folders with touching things for down kinda moments
• try to be in your zones of genius 60% of the time (goal)

Imposter syndrome

• zoom out recognition,

  • I don't like ever book, so why should everyone like me? Ill work with the 90% of people who like me and the others can go somewhere else
  • imagine you fail and then what?
  • probably less catastrophic than your think
  • ask for criticism often

Neuro science to bring your dreams to life

• visions board
• action board
• tells brain your safe enough to get out of survival mode
• helps you filter mentally for relevant things
• do annually
• put in a place you see regularly

Never be the one to say no to yourself

How to love yourself

Keep a promise to yourself

• you need to trust yourself first with action, otherwise empty words
• keep promises to yourself is how you get trust
• should be small and relatively easy

Eliminate jealousy

• avoid content that's makes you feel bad
• constant re-evaluation
• analyze the reason behind feelings of jealousy (and either abandon or mrl towards accordingly)

Personal bill of rights

• living by a set of unwritten rules that you hates

• make rights that you have just by existing permission to do or feel

• think of what you would tell your best friend or child

• don't stand for people who violate

• sample rights, I have the right to X

  • feel any feeling
  • advocate for self
  • to say no
  • to ask for what I want
  • make case if no
  • respect
  • like what I like
  • dislike what I don't
  • challenge people
  • accept people

Build belief in self

• note things inside yourself that you feel good about

Unlock the hidden info in your emotions

• don't judge your emotions
• try to accept and figure out what it's trying to tell you

Learn to love your body

• Accept your body, love is complicated and you don't need to love every aspect to love
• say 5 things you want to love about yourself
• my body is for feeling not looking at

How to be happier

Make your schedule match your values

• time track and re do wasted time into better things
• personal goals into calendar (regular calls to mom, workouts, relax time,)

Build tolerance for hard things

• challenge is good for you.
• meditation, col showers, exercise etc

Re wire your neural pathway for happiness

• brain has trails, the more you do the clearer the path as opposed to over grown.
• thus, notice and linger in good feels to strengthen pathways

Do something for someone else

Fill your life with joy

• note delight more often in life explicitly

• brain biased towards looking for it in life more

• themes

  • people, actives,

• joy not escapism

Make a life is never boring list

• list of things that are good and fun sorted by time so you can do good and satisfying things rather than social media doom scrolling

How to make and keep friends

Attract your dream friend

• be intentional about friends because they will encourage your habits and values

• try to identify why you want

  • cool hobbies
  • encourage x
  • I feel energized by being around

• look at whether people around you are like this

• let go of some people (doesn't need to be explicitly necessarily )

• fill with people who do the thing

• cast a wider net in your life (circle of acquaintances)

Near exposure effect

• people like others they are exposed to more (familiar, unconscious)
• recurring plans (club, teams, classes, weekly get together)

Be a fun magnet

• be a yes and kinda person, build in their ideas and don't shoot them down

  • don't criticize anyone, including yourself

• look for opportunities to laugh

• give people your full attention

Habitual open mindedness

• don't make assumptions

Become a winning conversationalist

• ask questions that aren't generic

  • working on anything exciting recently
  • have any exciting or fun plans for the weekend
  • what's been a recent big highlight for you?

• positive thoughts association with you and makes you more memorable

• if they don't take the bait

  • you can go first
  • you can just leave

• get good at listening

• ask deeper questions and follow ups

Deepen your existing friendships

• decide who (pick someone who wants to dot he stuff you want to do)

• get vulnerable (intimate self disclosure is great)

• show up for friend in time of need

  • make sure they know you're available to help when they are struggling
  • if they are sick send soup

How to up level your long term relationships

Be the CEO of your house hold

• care and optimizations in home and house life

  • figure out task distribution

  • design systems to help fix tasks (recurring reminders, automatically done things, out sourcing)

  • weekly meeting check in

    • things working? How fix system

• relationship check-in

  • how did you feel cared for
  • what would you like different for care
  • what's going on in terms of challenges
  • how can I support you in that
  • let's schedule some fun / intimacy time for us

Establish your rules for fighting

• like

  • no character assassination (no name calling or generalizations about them)
  • it's a CO op game, Fighting for relationship together
  • no leaving without saying when you're coming back
  • seek to understand before you seek to be understood
  • take ownership

Take your sex life to the next level

• normalize not feeling confident

• think about what you would do if you were more confident

• tiny changes

  • not making noise, breathing
  • can we try a different time
  • can you try kissing my neck

• schedule sex

  • get excited
  • our lives are super scheduled and this is fine

• expect the first one to be bad but enjoy it anyways

Let your loved ones surprise you

• don't assume things about them. Don't treat them like they were years ago
• perceptions are limiting and wrong
• be curious about them

How to make your gut feel great

Eat 30 types of plants per week

• good diets are additive instead of subtractive

Cook and cook your carbs

• changes structure to be a bit better for your colon

Eat more fermented foods

Get dirty

• touch nature, healthy skin gets dirty
• to much sanitation creates greater likely hood of autoimmune diseases

Don't I necessarily eliminate foods

Feed your good gut bacteria

• eat fiber
• artichokes, leeks, garlic, onions, asparagus
• post biotic, helps with cancer recovery, feeds gut biome well

Eliminate bloating and constipation

• poop more
• fiber + water
• magnesium gliceiate for anxiety, citrate 250 mg up to 500 mg for pooping
• raise knees over hips

How to love longer

Reframe stress relief

• long term low stress bad for you

• try

  • gratitude journaling
  • time in nature
  • deep breathing exercises

Maximize nutrients per bite

Floss and touge scrap

• bacteria in your mouth can get into other places in your body

Stop snoring

Upgrade the foods your already eating

• high quality olive oil, extra virgin
• rest your garlic (chop in immediately, at beginning and then add at the end and fry for just 1 - 2 minutes)

Challenge limiting aging beliefs

• largely a capitalism, manipulation thing
• blaming aging for health issues
• call out messages

Reassess your relationship with Alcohol

How to feel calmer

Set a new boundary

Do a life admin day

• schedule time to get all those little things that are bothering you done

Meditate but for less time than you think

• inhale for 4 exhale for 6

Action is the antidote to anxiety

Stop letting fear controll your relationship with Money

• gain knowledge about personal finance
• don't worry about the big crazy stuff out of your controll (like the economy)

Limit the physical cause of anxiety

• Anxiety in a blood sugar issue typically, not anything physically or mentally around you

Try and breath work practice

• sniff sniff, slow mouth breath out
• box breathing, nose in 4 counts, hold 4 counts, mouth out 4 counts, hold 4 counts

How to restore and rest

Have a post work ritual

• ideas

  • shower, walk, candle, close computer and move rooms,
  • meditate, snack, quick workout

Give your brain a bath

• yoga needra
• conscious but very relaxed

Take an at home silent retreat

Utilize the healing power of nature

• less than you think
• Looking outside or going for walks

Making better decisions

Practice cognitive offloading

• write stuff down,

• spending cognitive stuff trying to remember or recall is not worth the effort

  • tried and loved receipts
  • shopping list
  • pod cast ideas
  • Todo list
  • dreams
  • media I want to consume later
  • places I want to visit
  • intriguing products

Create a failure resume

• summary of screwups as well as what you learned
• should be free of judgement or shame

Into the intelligence of your body

• sub conscious knowledge
• awareness of body signals, shaky hands, awareness of heat beats etc.

Practice decisiveness

• trust yourself based
• protection from discomfort
• Good to learn how to tolerate discomfort

Get specific with your emotions

• try to think of 2 other options for what you could be feeling

Have no regrets

• be gentle with yourself
• learn the lesson, talk int he third person or talk to 10 years from now you
• Regret can help you move forward

How to be build resilience

Reframe negative emotion

• Bodily sensations are constant but you can re attribute emotions
• if palms sweats can attribute to excitement rather than anxiety

Create a mental health checklist

• structure to life (routines)
• Sleep
• exercise
• Relationships
• Nutrition

Remind yourself of your past resilience

Make an accomplishments list

• every week, write down every thing you accomplished. Also annual. Reminder that we're more productive than we think we are

Use your present relationship to heal your childhood wounds

• love should be unconditional

• identify your childhood pains

  • what did you want most as a child that you never got?

Create your own sense of safety and security

• connect with your child self to emotion
• connect with future self to connect with values.
• how would your past or future self feel about your actions

How to overcome road blocks

How to get unstuck

Fight back against the fairy tale

• real relationships aren't like fairy tales

Get to the root of low libido

• illnesses, medicines
• mental, distracted because of stress
• emotional, trauma or shame or guilt
• relationship on the whole, resenting things or arguing
• sensual, quality of sex (should be exciting, varied, feel good, engaging)

Reduce your pain

• pain is more holistic, biological, social, psychological elements
• pain perception affected by - anxiety - mood - focus

Take the risk

• regrets fall into these categories typically

  • foundation -

    • small decisions that accumulate, spent to much and saved too little, didn't care for their health
    • if only I'd done the work

  • moral

    • hurting someone

  • boldness

    • if only I'd taken he chance
    • still feels better if it fails
    • bias for action, make plan and ACT
    • connection
    • wishing you'd reached out to someone

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